Just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we who are many form one body. – Romans 12:4-5a
I just finished writing a post that I’m pretty excited about, so excited I’m tempted to “publish immediately.” But it’s not Friday.
I have self-diagnosed with mild O. C. D. (obsessive compulsive disorder), having read the definition: “having a tendency towards excessive orderliness, perfectionism, and great attention to detail.” Yep, that’s me – at least when it comes to blogging. (People who have been in my house might not apply that to every area of my life.)
I realized very early on that I would not be one of those prolific bloggers who post something every day. I don’t have that kind of time, mainly because I devote so much time and attention to each post down to the last detail. I’ll spend at least an hour writing a piece, then another hour or two trying to shave it down to roughly a thousand words. I will proofread so many times I lose objectivity and have to set it aside for a different day to approach it with fresh eyes.
I post every Friday. I figure for my followers with Monday-Friday jobs, it gives them all weekend to read my latest. Once a week has proven doable for me, so I make the effort to post every Friday. Part of my obsession is wanting to be reliable.
This compulsion to be reliable was reinforced by a follower who wrote in a Christmas card that she always looked forward to Fridays, because reading my blog was sometimes the only thing that kept her going through the week. So, if I post too much too soon, would there be a Friday I draw a blank or run out of time and let this follower down? Yes, I know, I’m making myself out to be too important here, but still, I aim for consistency.
I have another quirk that you might not expect in one with O. C. D., and that is A. D. D. (Attention Deficit Disorder) or as I call it, “E. D. D.” (“Easily Distracted Disorder.”) I saw a t-shirt once in a catalogue that I probably should have bought. It said: “I have O.C.D. and A.D.D. That means everything has to be perfect, but not for long.”
Yes, I am one of those who has a hard time focusing on pretty much anything. The best way for me to “focus” is to multitask. That way my brain can jump back and forth repeatedly from one task to the other and not get bored with either.
… until a third thing comes to mind, derailing everything, and all bets are off.
But I digress (*surprise, surprise*).
Can God use someone like me? Well, I sure hope so!
The Bible says in multiple places that the Body of Christ (the Church – Christians) is made up of many members, and just like a human body, every part has a job to do. An ear may not be able to see as the eye can, but it can provide hearing, which the eye can’t.
We all have our weaknesses, but the good news is that God can heal us of those weaknesses.
Or use us in spite of our weaknesses.
Or, He may do something even more extraordinary and use us through our weaknesses!
“How in the world does He do that?!“
I’m glad you asked. 😉
Let’s start with the O.C.D. A fellow blogger was expressing his frustration over this affliction and the way it interfered with his life. I’ll be the first to admit, being obsessive can really get one’s journey stuck in the mud. As with any problem, the first step is to PRAY. I can’t fix any problem without God’s help. As I purposefully redirect my attention to Him, He may remove the obsession. Or He may change its direction to something more worthy of obsessing over.
There are certain things I have felt “called” to do, which I have discussed in other posts. I am so convinced I am called to them that I feel compelled to fulfill that calling daily. As I told my fellow blogger with O.C.D, we are the people God can count on to keep our commitments. So, those things I have committed to pray about daily, I pray about daily.
Now comes the fun part (being sarcastic here), and I’m pretty sure there’s some spiritual warfare going on. After all, the battlefield is the mind. As convinced as I am that I’m called to daily prayer, I am also convinced that the enemy of my soul wants to derail my prayers at every corner. And here’s where the A.D.D. comes in.
I’m having a productive time of prayer, and my phone beeps. Or I think I heard it beep. I start to wonder what that beep was about, or where I even left my phone. Am I forgetting something that’s happening today? Was I supposed to be somewhere? I hope not. I wouldn’t want to repeat the blunder when I missed that meeting 23 years ago …
Fortunately, I am retired now, and although I’m still busy, my time is more flexible than before. Still, most nights I am up well past midnight, finishing up the things (mostly prayer) I am committed to do every day, without fail! Because of A.D.D. I didn’t get to them earlier, but because of O.C.D. I am not going to bed until I finish praying! Fortunately, I know God hears prayers that go out in the wee hours of the morning as much as He does the ones at dawn prayed by the got-it-all-together saints. *sigh*
Can distractions, in fact, be used by God for something positive, and not just leaving people like me struggling to “Pray without ceasing”?
The answer is “Yes!” And I’ll tell that story next time.
Prayer: LORD, You know each of us, because You made us. We acknowledge our imperfections and are all the more grateful that You choose and use us anyway. Help us not to use our quirks as excuses, but to serve You all we can with what You’ve given us. And when we fail, thank You for Your mercy and grace, in Jesus’ name. Amen.