You do not have, because you do not ask God. When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures. – James 4:2b, 3
“Lord, teach us to pray,” the disciples asked Jesus. (Luke 11:1) They had seen Jesus praying often and had seen His prayers answered promptly and miraculously. They wanted to wield that kind of power!
They, on the other hand, had recognized that they did not have the wisdom or the power to pray effectively. They already had a vague idea how not to pray, as I’m guessing most of us have, as well.
I have believed in Jesus for well over half a century, and I have come up with a reliable list of what doesn’t work when it comes to this most powerful force in the universe. (Trust me, there’s a reason I know all of them, with the exception of #10-1/2, which, not being a husband, I got straight from Scripture.)
So here, for your amusement and discernment, is the list of the
TOP TEN WAYS TO GUARANTEE YOUR PRAYERS WON’T GET ANSWERED*:
[10- 1/2 (Married men) Disrespect and mistreat your wife. (I Peter 3:7) ]
10. Give God tiny bits of your leftover time and second-rate resources and reserve the best for other things. Squander your time but hoard your stuff; don’t tithe. (Malachi 3:8-10) Fill your day/mind with secular media nonstop, so God can’t get a word in edgewise. (Romans 12:2)
9. Avoid that person you’ve been having a problem with, or who has a problem with you. (Matthew 5:23 & 24)
8. Accuse God of not understanding how important this is; He’s just not as smart as you are. (Isaiah 55: 8 & 9) Believe that health and wealth are the most important things, and if you aren’t healthy and wealthy, God must not care about you. (II Corinthians 12:7-10)
7. Ask once. Then if nothing happens right away, give up. Say, “See? I knew it wouldn’t work.” (Luke 18:1)
6. After saying “Amen,” immediately tell yourself all the reasons God’s probably not going to answer. For extra assurance, tell others, too. (James 1:6 & 7)
5. Keep God confined to one small area in your life, away from all the everyday events and far from any guilty pleasures, bad habits, and secret sins; He wouldn’t want to be around all that stuff, anyway. (Psalm 66:18)
4. Make a list of all the bad things that have been done to you, and who did it. Memorize it and recite it often. Share it with others and invite them to be offended with you. (Mark 11: 24 & 25)
3. Ignore what God has done for you in the past or complain about the way He did it or about what He hasn’t done. Whatever you do, don’t be grateful! (Philippians 4:6)
2. Ask not what you can do for God; ask what He can do for you. (James 4:3)
… and the Number One way to make sure your prayers don’t get answered [drumroll]:
#1.DON’T PRAY. (James 4:2)
Prayer: Lord, truthfully, we DO want to see our prayers answered, but we confess we do not always want the same things You do. Give us the right attitudes and desires for the things You long to give us. May we desire to know You and make You known. May we seek to know You more intimately every day – to see Your face, hear Your voice, feel Your embrace, and have our hearts beat in sync with Yours. Give us hearts like Yours, even if that means having our hearts broken with what breaks Your heart. Give us the right motives and priorities. (Give us wisdom!) Help us to draw ever closer to You, until we are one with You and can truly say, “THY will be done.” In Jesus’ name, amen.
*Excerpted from my book BARRIERS (So, if prayers are so powerful, how come mine don’t get answered?)
Seeking Divine Perspective 
This is lovely, Annie. However, not meaning to be nit picky, but I believe there is a misspelling in your closing prayer — (Give us widsom!)
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Yikes! Thank you, Linda! ❤
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Thank you for sharing this post Annie. It was very timely for me, being I’ve been praying for something for awhile. I recognized myself in some of what you wrote. Hope you’re doing well xx
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I suspect we can all relate in one way or another – or all of them
I tried to open one of your pieces and was told it was “unavailable,” but I haven’t forgotten you! 💕 Blessings!
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“Consider what you do with your time. How many minutes do you spend each day in prayer? Although the value of prayer cannot be measured by its volume, it can safely be said that prayer is valueless if you do not pray.” c.a.post
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Amen, c.a.
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Wow! Powerful list. I’ll have to bookmark this one.
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Funny you should say that, Rock. The first time I spoke on this subject I made bookmarks with a “checklist” for the attendees to use in their Bibles. (Except the checklist was in reverse – the RIGHT way to pray.)
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Me, crawling under table
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lol 😉
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Amen and Amen!
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Thanks for stopping by, Mandy. 😊
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Excellent list and backed by truth. I had to do a heart-check on some of these points.
Thank you sister, worth keeping and sharing.
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Thanks, Lisa Beth. I wrote a book on this subject (This is one of the appendices.) and I STILL need to be reminded. 🙄
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Annie, this is so good. I’m going to use the scriptures and reverse this list for the basis of a one-time Bible study lesson with some women. I’m not quite ready to begin our next longer study and this is perfect. We can all use reminders of these Biblical truths. It is an answer to my prayer of what to do in the interim. Thank you for sharing!!
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Manette,this is sort of a summary of the “barriers” described in my book “BARRIERS (So, if prayers are so powerful, how come mine don’t get answered?)” I made a 7-week study guide for it and taught a couple of classes with it, one in Michigan, one in Florida. I am hoping to get the study guide published as a companion to the book. Maybe someday your group might like to dig deeper…
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We completed a several-week study on prayer awhile back. I called the one I did “Kingdom Prayer” it covered the prayers of Jesus, Solomon’s instructions on prayer, and the prayers of Paul. I created a condensed summary making a downloadable PDF people can access on my blog.
Annie, I will watch for your companion guide. It will be a good addition and refresher for the foundation already laid. Thanks.
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A great list. I remember being brought up short by 10 1/2 several years ago for the first time, and it has motivated me to be a better husband!
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Probably because you already were a good husband, Keith. Something tells me the guys who really need to see this are thinking, “That’s not me.”
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Thanks, Ann. I guess you’d need to check with my wife on that! 😉
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And then there are those times God does answer prayer in spite of ourselves …
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This is true. Sometimes He’ll even give us what we asked for and thought we wanted, and we find out we didn’t want that at all! (In those times what He’s giving us is actually an education. 🙄😏)
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Reading this makes me think about how often we sabotage our own prayer, don’t we? Good post
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Yes, we do. Silly people. 🙄
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Amen! 🙂
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Yikes I might be guilty of number 3…thank you for sharing this eye opener!!!!
Now if you’ll excuse me I have some forgiveness to seek and some prayer-reframing to figure out!!!!!😅🙏🙌❤️
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YAY! 🤸
Alicia, I was praying this post wouldn’t just be entertaining/amusing. Of course, I don’t NEED to know the results in this life, but it is so good of the Lord to let me know every now and then. Thanks for making my day. Blessings! 🙂
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❤️
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The list definitely allows us to take a hard look at ourselves.
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That’s the main reason I wrote it, Goldie. I tell myself, “If the shoe fits, kick yourself with it, and adjust attitude accordingly.”
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That closing prayer is so meaningful, Annie. I’m going to copy it down and put it among my prayer cards! Thank you.
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Thanks for letting me know, Nancy. That blesses me. 😊💕
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Thank you for reminding us what we should be doing!
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(and should NOT be doing. 😏😉) Thanks for stopping by, Diane.
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What a wonderful post: we should learn to pray WELL
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Amen, Luisa! That’s the purpose of the book – our “unanswered prayers’ aren’t God’s fault!
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Thank you again!!!
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