Mom’s Greatest Lesson

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She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. …  Her children arise and call her blessed.                                                                                                                                                                                                      Proverbs 31: 26, 28a

In recognition of my mother’s birthday, here is my tribute to her, taken from the eulogy I wrote in 2001.

As a little girl I loved doing things for my mother. Whether I gave her a drawing, a homemade gift, or a surprise breakfast, she would tell me I was so sweet and thoughtful and clever and artistic and creative and smart and wonderful in every way. And, being the trusting little child that I was, I believed it. (This was long before “self-esteem” was the buzz-word that it is today.)

Self-esteem was not so easy to come by in junior high school, where I dangled between coolness and dorkdom. I thought I’d found my ticket to permanent membership in the cool crowd, the day the coolest guy in eighth grade invited me to a concert the next night. I said I’d love to go; he said he’d call me. Being the trusting little eighth grader that I was, I believed it.

But the next day as the hours ticked by, I became more anxious, and my mother became angrier.

“Hasn’t that nasty little boy called you yet!?” (Hearing the coolest guy in eighth grade called a “nasty little boy” was an amazing thing!)

By 8:00 it was obvious that I’d been stood up. I shut myself in my room, wondering what in the world I would say to my friends after telling them all about the big date. (Talk about counting your chickens …)

My mother must have known what I was thinking. She came in and sat quietly on the bed for a few minutes. Finally, she said, “You can blame me if you want.”

“What?”

“If you want, you can tell your friends I wouldn’t let you go.”

I wasn’t about to do that to my mother, but that night I think I realized my best friend was right there beside me. And with a friend like that, who needs to be cool?

My love life got better, of course. I remember Marty’s telling my parents with fear and trembling that we wanted to get married. As Dad ran for the champagne, Mom hugged Marty and said tearfully, “Welcome to the family!”

Fast forward to Mom looking through the glass at her first grandchild. I could tell the glass was really bothering her. She kept exclaiming impatiently, “I can’t wait to get my hands on her!” She couldn’t start loving that baby soon enough.

I remember the day I learned Mom was having some serious surgery. I hopped a plane and came to St. Louis, wondering if this was my last chance to see my mother.

I was allowed to stay in her hospital room the night before. – We were “roomies!” We watched a corny Tom Cruise movie together and talked and giggled late into the night.

At 5:30 Mom was wheeled away for her surgery, and I lay awake, asking God to please take care of my mom.

Mom’s heart stopping during the surgery; she told me about it later:

The monitor was beeping, then it wasn’t. The room seemed to fill up with a fog, and voices seemed far away. The doctor yelled to her, someone pounded on her chest, and the monitor started beeping again. My prayer was answered, and Mom was given back to us for a little while.

A few years later Mom was diagnosed with cancer. She underwent radiation, again prayers went out, and again she was given back to us for a little while.

The following February Mom fell and hit her head. When I got to the hospital, the doctor took me to her room. He shook Mom and called to her, but he couldn’t wake her up. It was terrible not to be able to tell her I loved her.

I had brought my guitar, and my sister her “lap harp.” We had heard or read that a person in a coma can still hear, so we sang to her, even in the ICU:  “And He walks with me, and He talks with me, and He tells me I am His own … ” Then I saw it.

Mom’s lips were moving! She was singing along, and I wondered what kind of conversations she was having with Jesus. Again prayers went up and were answered; Mom woke up, and again she was given back to us for a little while. A few weeks later she left us.

But the most important memory I have of my mother is a conversation that impacted my life long before all this happened:

“Mommy, I know good people go to heaven and bad people go to hell, but how do you know you’re good enough?” (I was starting to have doubts about being wonderful in every way.)

Well. Mom wasted no time telling me there was bad news, and there was good news. The bad news: Nobody’s good enough, “for all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.” (Romans 3:23) and “The wages of sin is death, but [the good news!] the gift of God is eternal life through Christ Jesus.” (Romans 6:23) Mom told me I don’t get to heaven by being “good enough,” I get to heaven by believing Jesus died on the cross to take the punishment for my sins.

… kind of like her being willing to be the bad guy to help me save face with my friends.

He did this so that God could open His arms to me and say “Welcome to the family!”

He removed the barrier that separates me from my heavenly Father, Who can’t wait to get His hands on me – not to punish or manipulate me, but to love me.

Jesus loves me, this I know, for the Bible tells me so. This is the greatest truth I have ever known, and I got it from my mother. My children got it from their mother. And because I believe it with all my heart, I know that I will see my mother again. And this time it won’t be for a little while, it’ll be forever.

(I miss you, Mom, but I’ll see you later.)

(Oh, and happy birthday.)

Prayer: Thank You, Lord, for a believing mother and her legacy of grace. Make me faithful in passing the faith along to future generations. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Published by seekingdivineperspective

I am a forgiven sinner and adopted child of God, seeking to see life from His perspective - as opposed to the world's flawed perspective - and living my life accordingly.

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53 thoughts on “Mom’s Greatest Lesson”

  1. Oh my goodness Annie, reading this my heart was so warm and touched my God! Your mom reminds me a lot of my mom, my best friend. She also told me about Jesus. Thank you for sharing your story. Not only do we see a picture of an incredibly beautiful soul in your mom, but we also see the way to heaven, and eternal life! ❤️

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    1. That was my original purpose in writing the piece years ago, besides paying tribute to my dear mom. I knew there were going to be people at the service who didn’t know the Lord, and I wanted so much for them to see Him, one way or another. For the week before the service, I woke up every night at about 3:00 as the Lord gave me another memory. At 3 A.M. the day of the service, He showed me how to put them all together as a picture of salvation. (!)

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  2. Such a heartwarming tribute to your mom. She seemed to be such a warm and loving person. Such a blessing to have a mum like that and I am reminded of the blessing I have of a loving mum who loves the Lord too.

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  5. Annie, that was beautiful. It teaches so much on so many levels. Biblically there is a peek we get about “time” from heaven’s side. It happens to be part of the view through the stained glass I hang my hat on. It seems that those behind heaven’s gate are not cursed with the clock. When you see her walk up to you, when your appointment arrives, for her it will seem as she just left you yesterday. I believe that. God’s grip – Alan

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  7. A very beautiful tribute to your mom. I like when you described how you and your sister played music for your mom.
    It also reminds me of the opportunities that we, as women, have, to be spiritual ‘moms’ to others. God bless you for sharing this. 🤗

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  8. Thanks, Sally. My sister and I were on the road in her RV last Mother’s Day, so we visited a church in Utah. When they did a Mother’s Day tribute, they asked ALL the women to stand and receive gifts form the children, recognizing that there were many women there who weren’t biological mothers but nevertheless had sown into the lives of the children. ❤ (The little children came in and gave us packages of flower seeds. ❤ ❤ )

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    1. Thank YOU.
      By the way, I “liked” one of your recent posts, (about being “older” than your years, introverted, and autistic – am I getting that right?), and I wanted to comment but saw no “comment” button. I know some people have been having technical trouble, but others have just turned off the comments… just letting you know. (I liked what you said about being a different person on stage.)

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      1. You’re welcome! And thank you! ☺ I have had problems recently with the comment button randomly shutting itself off. Very frustrating. Thanks for letting me know. I’ll look into it.

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  19. You know that you are a great story-teller and writer. There’s always something in your posts that grabs my attention and causes me to think deeper. This post was on a whole other level. Maybe because I saw so much of my mom in it… Wonderful job!

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  25. I love this story about your Mom. I also had a believing mother who I know prayed for her children and grandchildren.
    I miss you Mom…will see you in Heaven someday.

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